I give it to you....

I am in love
with love
the idea of being loved
of having loved
of breathing just to hear
her heart beat
I am in love with
the walk
the smile
the face
the eyes
the hair
the stare
into space
when she is thinking
dreaming
This love that binds me
is so freeing
I am in love with love
the idea of being loved
of having been loved
of having been in love
the scent of her
lingering in the air
of scense of the prescense
before my love is even there.
I am in love
with love
my love
for her
her love for me.
This is love
my love
and now I give it to you.

I thought life was supposed to be fun!

There used to be so many people
I could call
talk to
run to
When I needed a friend
Yet here I sit
alone,
amidst the night
Just me & the moon
though somehow
I doubt that he cares
whether or not
I'm alright
The TV talks, begs, fights
in the distance for my attention
But all I can think about
is the voice in my head that I forgot to mention
It keeps me up
These days
Any days,
That I'm in a rut
Makes me feel like I'm some kind of nut
I'm too old to numb myself
with high school drugs
Too young to be done
I thought life was supposed to be fun?

This Cage

I am stoned
on a Friday,
afternoon
The music lingers
like a cloud in the back of my mind
I'm suddenly becoming harder to find
I tried to lose myself
on a crowded street
but no matter where I went
I always came back to me.
Hard to be anything anymore
I lost my face
Once I was given a number

There's nothing social or secure about it
Am I the only one who
bothers to wonder
How the generation that gave us peace and love
now heard us like we're cattle?
(Don't Shove!)
The world's suddenly in a hurry to reach their doom
I mean destiny
But me I'm a tortoise in this race
I can't let them get the best of me
I refuse to be silenced.
and if they want me gone, they'll have to arrest me.
The things I see
and the things I hear,
just don't match up
Peace and love
are more important than how desperate of a housewife you are
Me, I'll take the life of a farmer
over the need for a suit of armor
Yeah peace and love
It's my favorite drug
and all the rage
Come with me,
let's break out of this cage!

Empty Tank

I'm learning to loathe
the gas light
on my dash
which screams at me
the way my father used to scream at me
reminding me of my place in society
and how I will never seem to have enough
or be enough
why does everything always have to be so damn tough?

Today is supposed to be a new day
but instead it's just another day
of struggling with myself
to lose myself
while trying to find myself
while it always starts out a little different
it always seems to end the same

What is this sick and twisted game?
Amidst this crowd
I am alone
Just looking for a place to call home
Inside I am a child
Outside I'm full grown

Flick away the cigarette
Tired of kissing butts
There's got to be a way to get out of this rutt
What happened to my dreams?
Better yet what happened to my hope?
Maybe I left it on the table
When I picked up my dope

I've got 250 contacts in my phone
but what good is calling folks
who never seem to be home?

Pack my life into more boxes
wondering where my other sock is

There's nothing like being stuck
But I can't be like them
I've got to give a fuck


If only I could get enough money for gas
I could put enough fuel in my tank
to move on to the next town
the next crowd
the next site where I can drown
my sorrows
At the sadness of today being the last of my tomorrow's

Try to Find Me

There are all kinds of things
Rumbling around with
Thunderous waves
Kind of sound
inside of me
I'm a stranger to myself
and a danger to myself
Seeds of doubt long ago planted
inside my flower pot
makes the noise never stop
stop
stop
STOP!
I stomp my feet
like the child I am
and retreat
inside the tent I've pitched
inside of my lonely mind.
Maybe one of these days
Someone will care enough
to try to find me.

Keeping People In Their Places

I am forgotten
by an unforgiving society
who falsely lables
innocent children as trouble makers
as a means of keeping people in their places

I am amazed
that I am even sitting here typing these words
as once upon a time all I could afford was to steal
extra napkins from fast food joints that charged the homeless twenty five cents
for a cup of free water
as a means of keeping people in their places

I am confused
about when it's my turn in the game
of life that once seemed to never end
but now is moving faster than I can dream of
one by one eliminating
those who just can't keep up
as a means of keeping people in their places

I am hurt by
all that have touched me
suppose it's from the brusies I endured in the womb
as he hit her
and she hit
the bottle then the pipe
it was a way for them to keep each other in their places


I am dumbfounded
at the lengths people will go to
to destroy the lives of one another
as a means of keeping them in their places

and I wonder
if I will ever find
a place to be kept in
rather than thrown away from?

obsessions

Obsessions are
romantic notions
that I am so important
that I might diet a death
which will leave me immortal

Headlines read
"Amazing soul, tragically lost
to debris of space dust which came crashing through
three stories of a building
only to pierce the skull of victim."

Obsessions are
romantic notions that time marches
ahead just to torture me
while eluding the rest of societies "normal folks".

Although I do no identify with the part of humanity
that can be unremarkably selfish, shallow, and egotystical
my obsessions are what make me just that.

Obsessions are unromantic and unapologetic
the kidnappers and rapists that invade and poke,
and prod
and tease
and torture
while holding me captive in the basement of this life
without the allowance of milk carton pictures
and search parties

Obsessions fill each pore
each cell
each drop of water
flowing through the
anxious veins and arthritic hands
which type relentlessly on calloused fingers
at 2 am with this drunkenly insomniatic mind of mine

fleeting

Do you know what it's like
to live your life
vicariously
As actors
storm on screen
grab passionately
somewhere in the distance
the roar of a motorcycle
credits roll
and you know
it'll all be ok.

What happened to those days?

When I was not just a spectator
of the outside world
but a weaver of words

back packs full of adventures
documented historical facts
on brown paper bags with logos
of last week's lunch
from that 99 cent feast

but now,
stomach full of glutenous glucose
sugary sweet life of normalacy
it has happened.

I am them.

NaNoWriMo

During the month of November, the folks over at NanoWriMo held a writing contest of sorts where they tried to inspire writers to write a novel of 50,000 words within a single 30 day period.

I spent roughly a week actually writing over the course of the November and managed to complete the challenge with 50,114 words.

Let me know it if you'd like to read it!

You wanted poetry, You got it!

Requests have been pouring in via EastCoastPoet.com requesting that I start posting again and that i start adding more to my site.

For those of you who've found this page via www.eastcoastpoet.com, congratulations you found my egg.

For those of you who have never heard of EastCoastPoet.com, please check it out!